I am very super duper very very very de useless leh... such a simple word of "break-up" I cant even say it loud and clear to him... don know why... cant bear? Think so ba... I think some of my friends... in fact all of my friends will think I very very useless... even I made up my mind and promise really really hard that I cannot continue this relationship with him but I still cannot give up...

Ok la... I'll tell you all wat actually happen la...

Actually this morning I already prepared wat to say to him... I even prepared to had a really big quarrel with him... I went into his house my own... since there's no one but himself in the house and I called his hp he still cannot wake up... I open the door myself loh... haha... *I very zi dong hor?* then I go into the house he still sleeping in the room... so I go touch touch my computer loh... First go friendster... then ai ya... back to main point...

He wake up... I nv talk to him... his temper breaks up again... his father called while he was sleeping... he was very frustrated... I know la... Everytime like that de mah... xi guan jiu hao loh... then he went down to take something from his father... after he came up... I continue not to talk to him... but think I too soft-hearted... He started making sound of pain like *Sss... Sss...* Ok la... at first I try to control myself and don care abt him... but after that I see him searching around for pain killer, I just cant bear... I don know why... and I was later told by him that actually he went for a gang fight yesterday and his arm kena sprain... And that's the reason y he shouted at me yesterday... Think I too trust him or watever... I think its true... cos I see that his arm was very very red... After that I give him a big nagging... things like "Y go gang fight???", "Y go gang fight just becos yr friend asked you to???", "Do you know that if you kena caught you may be send to boy's home???", "Do you know that you may loss yr life becos of that???" and bla bla bla....

At first he think I very naggy... but after that think he know I care abt him ba... he started to talk softly to me loh... haiz... soft-hearted... soft-hearted... Useless bump... haiz...

Well... but I still din give up the thought of changing bf... I am just waiting the right time and right moment to do it... Anyway... I don think I will win that some call Australia Student de loh... So anyway... I will still be dumped by him de la... even though he say, "Not really loh... how you know definitely you are the one who will lose?" But I got a really really strong feeling that I will lose this battle... Gd luck to me... haiz...